Published: 2025-08-09

The router's white light blinked, on, and off, on, and off. The internet connection was gone, once again. It was the third time that day, and it will continue like that. Should I restart it, thought Will after crouching under his carbon fiber desk and taking a look at it. That fixed the problem before, so chances were the problem was the router itself and not the service provider. Will had to call the company and report the problem; it was inevitable. What do I have to call? What’s wrong with sending an email? Thought Will. But he quickly realized the flaws of his logic: there was no internet connection. After letting out a big sigh, Will reached into his pocket and dialed the phone number found in the back of the router. Here I go, he thought.

“Thanks for being part of the XCOM family, the biggest internet provider in the world.” Said a female prerecorded voice. “If you know the code of the department you want to get in contact with, please enter it now.” The recording continued.

“To receive information about products and services, press 1. To hear about our benefits, press 2. To report a problem, press 3. To talk to o…” Will pressed 3 before listening to the rest of the recording.

“To report a problem with your phone service, press 1. For satellite internet, press 2. Wired internet, press 3. Wireless in…” Will pressed 3, once again, before letting the recording finish.

“For business plans, press 1. Domestic plans, pr…” Will pressed 2, interrupting the recording a third time.

“Please enter your ten-digit contract number followed by #.” Said the recording.

Finally. No more prompts. No more listening to the cold, lifeless, recorded voice. No more wasting time. I am a prompt away from reporting the problem and getting some answers. Now, where did I put that contract number? Thought Will. “Please enter your contract number followed by #.” Kept repeating the prerecorded voice coming out of the cellphone’s speaker while Will, crouching under the carbon fiber desk, looked for the contract number at the bottom of the router.

“You have exceeded the waiting time. Goodbye!” Said the prerecorded voice, and the call ended.

Will rapidly stood up. He could not believe that, after all he had to go through, he now had to do it all again. He sat down, took his hands to his face, and sighed. He stayed like that for a minute, and then stood up. Let’s do it again.

He dialed the customer service number once again and sat through all the same prompts once more. “Press 3 to report a problem.” “Press 3 for wired internet.”, “Press 2 for Domestic plans”, Will could hear these words even before the prerecorded voice said them, and he pressed accordingly.

“Please enter your ten-digit contract number followed by #.” Finally, said the recording once again.

“4815162342” Inputted Will, with a grin of satisfaction on his face. He had finally beaten the machine.

“Thank you. We will connect you with one of our agents. Please hold.” Said the prerecorded voice.

At last, a human being to talk to was only mere seconds away, and Will could put all this behind him.

“Thank you for calling XCOM, the biggest internet provider in the world. Stephanie Smith speaking, how may I help you?” Said a warm woman’s voice coming from the other side of the phone.

“Hi, I want to report a problem with my router. The internet connection has been coming and going all day long, and a white light keeps blinking. Can you help me?” Said Will.

“I’ll be happy to help, sir. Please hold.” Said Stephanie, before putting Will on hold.

After a few seconds, Stephanie’s voice started coming out of the speaker again, “Thank you for patiently waiting, sir. What you describe appears to be a broken router. Unfortunately, we cannot help you with that. For broken or defective equipment, please contact the XCOM support hotline at 876-5309. That’s 879-5309. Can I help you with anything else?”

“No. You have done plenty already.” Said Will, after letting a big sigh out.

“I understand, sir. My name is Stephanie Smith, and it was a pleasure to help you. Have a nice day.” Said Stephanie, before hanging up.

Will sat there with his phone in hand, while the router's white light blinked, on, and off, on, and off. Until he finally said “Fuck.”

THE END.